God has never felt alone. Maybe there were moments, such as when Jesus called out, “why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46), that He suddenly felt ignored and cut off, but He never lingered there. It was a purely human thing to feel alone when the truth is He was never alone.
God has never felt the feeling of two either. Even as Jesus, when it was just Him and one disciple talking together while the others were away, Jesus was aware of three presences. His friend, the Holy Spirit, and God the Father.
Three, the Trinity, is what God has called complete. Longer than we could ever imagine, for eternity, God has had completeness in Himself. It is no wonder that He would want our marriages to mirror this same relationship.
My husband and I have always placed God at the center. He is first, the one we come to for advice, guidance, and love. In Him, we are complete, not in each other. I love Aaron with all my heart, He is my companion, and our marriage bond makes us one, however, He cannot complete me. And what a weight that would be on his shoulders to fulfill such a role!
Adam began with Eve a part of him, and though God felt he should have Eve at his side, Adam first only knew God. And I bet, it was enough for Adam. Just as it was enough for God before He created us. We do not see Adam asking for a helper, only God feeling that it would be good if Adam had one. Why is that?
It all goes back to why God created us and the angels. If He is complete in Himself, why create other beings at all?
I’ve known my husband for a long time, God even longer. I’ve experienced God’s love and have felt loved by Aaron. The wonder of love is that it grows and multiplies. And often longs to pour out. We long to both receive and give love. In other words, love longs to be shared. And that is why God has given us the ability to bear children.
Gods love is so great within the Trinity, that He longed to share it with children of His own. And so we were created in order for Him to share His love. Marriage mirrors this in that after a while a happily married couple longs to share their love by growing their family. A child in itself is the result of love. He/she is a person made up of two individuals that came together as one. And likewise, we were made by God in His image, the image of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit as an expression of His great never-ending love.
And so I claim that it takes three to make a marriage work. It takes three to reflect Christ and His love for the church. I once saw an image that demonstrated this beautifully. There was a bride and a groom with hands locked together, and God was in the middle, with His hand on top of theirs, holding them together, cementing their bond and adding to it with His own.
Through God we see each other more clearly, we love more honestly and fully. In Him, I see not just a man when I look at my husband, but a son created by God, in His image, loved perfectly and whole-heartedly. This helps me to look past his flaws and mistakes, to honor him and his authority as my husband because in doing so I honor God.
“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”
– Matthew 18:20