As of yesterday, I am now 20 weeks into my pregnancy (this picture is not exactly recent). I took this right before I even knew I was pregnant, a strange thing to look back on now, since it really wasn’t that long ago that my body was slim and entirely “my own.”
Another interesting thing to note was that I decided I wanted a shorter haircut around the time I became pregnant and I remember clearly that I wanted a more “motherly,” and older look. Why? People never believe that I’m 25 or that I’ve been married for over 5 years now, and in my heart, I knew that motherhood was the next big adventure awaiting me.
So at 20 weeks, I must say that I have changed as much as my body has. Perhaps it’s because, with each passing day, it all becomes more “real.” Only 20 weeks left and I will officially be holding a child in my arms, and not just in my heart.
Pregnancy so far has been interesting, and not overly challenging. I’ve had morning sickness pretty frequently during the first trimester, but only vomited a few times in all. My symptoms and doctor visits have all gone according to the book. No problems, healthy baby, normal bodily changes, and nothing to hint at an abnormal delivery.
I am thankful to God for this. And amazed at my own body’s abilities to cope with such changes, child-bearing is a natural bodily process after all. I find comfort in this when I encounter new symptoms or when my body continues to stretch and morph into someone I don’t quite recognize. It’s all worth it. And I knew what I signed up for when I wanted to be a mother even though personally I never experienced this. That is the joy of being surrounded by mothers is that they will gladly tell you all the things that pregnancy and labor entails…though I’ve discovered that those who had hard pregnancies and labors are the most vocal of the bunch.
The way I see it…God is with me and has the baby and my best interests at heart. All sin, including the fall of man, is covered in Christ’s sacrifice. To me that means the curse of painful child-bearing doesn’t have to be accepted today, it was a punishment for a sin that Christ died for.
I know, it may sound like a laughable dream of mine, but don’t all miracles sound laughable at first? I just see no reason in not trying to walk in the gifts Christ paid for today, we’ve got nothing to lose in trying and believing. It may, in fact, be necessary if we are to eventually activate these gifts…might as well test our faith now right?
Whether God gives me painless quick labor or not, I am still thankful to Him for this new life within me and I still choose to view that day as a celebration and a gift from a Good Father. Children are blessings. Amen?
Next Thursday is the big day that I find out the gender. I can’t wait to finally know! Perhaps once I know, a name will also present itself…hopefully I can discover the name that best fits our child and their amazing destiny in Christ.
Thank you all who have prayed and followed my pregnancy so far! And may God bless all you parents out there who have labored in love, I look up to you and honor you.