Upside Down

“For you formed my inward parts; you covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” —Psalm 139:13-14

From the moment the pregnancy test showed two faint lines—I knew I was going to be a mother.

Everything changed in that moment of understanding. God had blessed me with a gift, a human being. And it was something to be celebrated regardless of the “how” we would prepare for this new arrival.

The finances, the pregnancy hurdles, my job, all the things we needed…those unknowns paled in comparison to the joy. God would not abandon us, nor our unborn child.

As we prepared, our selfish ways began to melt away. And continued to do so long after our son was born. As is the way with parenthood, we are changed. Willing to sacrifice it all for our kids. They are our legacy—God’s precious jewels, paid for by the blood of Christ. The kings and queens of every nation. Born for such a time as this…

And worthy of protection above all else.

Only…they aren’t protected, far from it in fact. And instead of us willing to die for our kids, now we expect our kids to die for us??

Women are forgetting their own value and identity. So much so that they are killing their offspring and calling it good.

The very same evil that Israel fell into in the Old Testament:

“They sacrificed their sons and their daughters to false gods . They shed innocent blood, the blood of their sons and daughters, whom they sacrificed to the idols of Canaan, and the land was desecrated by their blood.” (Psalm 106:37-38)

Today, we sacrifice our children to other idols, the idol of self. Convenience killing. The idol of Feminism. Not the same feminism which once fought for the right to vote, for equality.

This breed of feminism is birthed from a lust for power and to “be” god or the heads of society. The curse against women, was that they would desire to control or rule over their husbands (Genesis 3:16). This began the power struggle between genders.

Of course, through Christ, these curses no longer have influence in our lives. If we are born again, the old self is gone and the new is here. Christ took the sins of the world upon Him so that we could start anew—as blameless as we were in the garden before the fall.

Sadly, much of the world still clings to the fallen man, unrepentant, unchanged because they do not know Christ or have His Spirit within them. If our identity is not in Him then it will be in another—in this case, self/gender/sexual orientation.

Sin is never satisfied where it is, but continually seeks more until death is the result. Like a drug addict, the sinner spirals deeper into deception, and the devil of this world laughs. He knows mankind and our pitfalls, just as he knew Adam and Eve’s. There are no new tricks up his sleeve and none are needed.

And he deceives us so craftily that we don’t even realize it. Like with Eve, he feeds us half truths, not blatant lies. He slowly leads us down a path we would have never taken at the start. And once down it we quickly forget where we were and where we were heading.

People who are lost in wickedness would never call themselves evil. The devil has slowly warped their minds with partial lies and manipulation, until they are brainwashed into believing good to be evil and evil to be good.

So it is with abortion, so it was with child sacrifice. The lines blur, black and white turns to gray, and the moral compass instilled into society through the Word of God, suddenly appears hostile and radical instead of freeing and righteous.

The protection of babies and mothers, the unique and vital roles of men and women, of the family unit all twisted and destroyed in the name of progression. As if this spiral downwards was actually going up, and mankind was becoming righteous by unbecoming it.

I am a woman. I am a wife. I am a mother.

Before all of this I was a child. I was a baby. I was a fetus. I was.

The devil hates God and His image bearers so much so that he will do anything to destroy us (since he failed to destroy God and His plans). He destroys us in many ways, knowing full well that simply killing us won’t do the trick since those who believe will return to God in Heaven.

No, he wants to rip us from God and condemn us to hell where he may torment us for all eternity.

How does he do this? Through attacking our identity, making us forget who we are and whose we are. That is why women hate the skin the were born with, the men who they are called to submit to, the children they were made to carry, the roles they were created for, their bodies—their actual gender! They are depressed, constantly searching for lasting joy and fulfillment, for purpose, and love that isn’t empty and twisted.

In this way they live yet are dead. They mock and blaspheme God by their rebellion and mutilation and sin. And the devil stomps on them with glee, making them low and sick and a banquet meal for demons.

“But what about the rape victims?” “What about this or that?” “What about the men?”

All these pointless questions and accusations over Roe v. Wade being overturned is making me ill.

What about the CHILDREN? It’s like watching a house burn and asking the home owners, did you save the phone charger? Hmm? Did you leave the curling iron on?

Let’s talk about these questions AFTER the unborn are protected! The less than 1% of pregnant rape victims, the responsibility of the fathers, the freak accidents or scenarios in which debates and discussions should be had can wait til after we stop the greatest genocide in all of history!

“Well I believe abortion is ok at conception” or “it’s ok at so and so a point or under these circumstances.”


Evil begets more evil. Abortion began this way and now look at it. You can abort your full term baby! You can’t keep it at conception, it can’t be stopped this way. No compromises! You’re either for it entirely or against it entirely!

It’s time we take a stand! That we raise our voices over this issue for the sake of those who are voiceless and for the women as well! They are given misinformation, they are often treated like they don’t have a choice at Planned Parenthood and other pro-abortion clinics that just want your money and your baby parts to sell! Fathers are also being stripped of their voice, it’s just as much their child. You want men to take responsibility? Allow them to have a voice in their children’s life!

This world is upside down and only we can right it again through revival and truth. And most importantly—love. A love that cares for everyone, every gender, every soul, regardless of where they are (born or unborn).

If we won’t stand for life, we stand for our own death.


Volunteer at your local pro-life pregnancy center.

Sign up for March/Walk for Life. If there are no groups in your town doing this you can start your own.

Donate to pregnant mothers and offer them aid/counsel/support in any way you can. Pregnancy is hard (I know) but not impossible! Women need to believe in themselves and their strength again.

Support/follow activists and their organizations which offer other resources to these women and speak on our behalf on mainstream media and political boards.

Call out hypocrisy! Those who say they are brothers in Christ who are attacking the people and not the sin. This causes severe damage in reaching the lost and doesn’t save lives.

If I came across as harsh, please understand. I am zealous about this issue. If I died tomorrow I want my legacy to reflect that I cherish life and the life of innocent children most of all. I work as a Sunday school teacher and have a son myself. I see first hand the unique giftings each child brings to the world.

They are world changers.

Give them a world that can be saved.



“Unplanned” Movie Review & Discussion

The story behind Abby Johnson, once a leading director for Planned Parenthood—now a pro-life activist.

I must admit, it took me a few years to watch this movie because of the subject matter. I am obviously pro-life and work with children on a weekly basis. Now I’m also a mother which sheds a whole new perspective on the matter of abortion.

It wasn’t long before I was bawling (the movie begins with Abby’s defining moment—which led to her immediate resignation from PP). From there, it then backtracks to her college days where, like many of us, she was young, naive, and oh so rebellious.

Movie Summary:

Separated from her Christian parents, she quickly fell into the devil’s schemes of deception and sin. She was intimate with a boy, became pregnant, and (out of fear/convenience) had her first abortion.

Later, she married the same guy, and quickly wanted out. He cheated on her and she divorced him—but not after discovering she was pregnant again. Hating her ex and not wanting to be tied to him she had another abortion.

In the midst of all this she became involved with PP, and even had one of her abortions through them. It was one of the most traumatic experiences for her because of the pain and blood loss—something that PP had not told her would happen.

Despite this, she was convinced into supporting PP and even working there after attending a college job fair. They fed her more lies; “it’s not a baby yet, you know?”, “PP’s goal is to lower the abortion rates not raise them.”

It was her first job. And it involved running out to the cars and hurrying patients indoors before they could hear anything from the pro-lifers shouting through the fence bars at them. She truly believed she was helping women and many of the pro-life voices were so full of hate that it deepened her commitment.

She moved up and up until one day she was appointed director of the clinic. This didn’t come quickly—she had remarried a good man and had become pregnant, this time, keeping her child against PP’s advisement.

As time passed, it became clearer to Abby that PP was actually pushing abortions over their other services, lying to patients about the risks, side-effects, and mental trauma, and manipulating women into killing their children instead of taking a neutral stance.

Abby witnessed more atrocities, the near death of a high school girl who was forced into getting an abortion by her father, the valuing of money and image over women’s health and safety, the heartless way they handled patients and worst of all—their unborn babies, was almost too hard to stomach at times.

Finally Abby’s defining moment came, one that would forever change her. She was called in to actually witness an abortion on an ultrasound. She stood in shock as the doctor, like some awful predator, pursued the baby, who struggled and fought to avoid him. In mere moments he had succeeded and the baby was ripped apart on screen for her to see.

She put in her resignation and faced for the first time the full weight of guilt and shame at what she had done. Hundreds, thousands of precious humans killed…and she took part in it, as well as in the death of her own two children.

PP sued her on unfounded claims and she walked free with the help of a lawyer and her new pro-life friends from Coalition of Life. Who has often prayed outside her clinic.

God walked her through repentance and self forgiveness and she has now dedicated her life to “life.” Literally so, in that she is a mother of seven children, a pro-life author (Unplanned is based off of her book), created and manages an anti-abortion ministry called “And Then There Were None,” which helps women leave the abortion field and regularly attends conventions and speakings.

Honestly, I thought the movie really opened my eyes to what happens in PP and other abortion clinics. The numb self denial and deception, the brainwashing, the dehumanizing way they treat babies and even the mothers is sickening when viewed from outside in. But to these women who are involved, they really don’t see it. They have no idea they are chained down and actually in many ways—anti-choice, anti-women, anti-life, and anti-God especially.

We see this anti-God in how Abby and her coworkers talk about church and their Christian families during the lunchroom scene.

Abby was told from the beginning that abortion was necessary, that they were merely a clump of cells, often formless and unable to feel pain. She saw the desperation in women and wanted to free them from it—not realizing that it only added to their pain and suffering. When she finally witnessed an abortion from the viewpoint of the fetus—she knew immediately it was life and capable of fear and pain.

The last shred of morality within her cried out and longed to save that which was innocent and good.

The modern day feminist is truly the death of femininity. The nurturing, life-giving aspect of women is being squashed and replaced with the pursuit of knowledge and power. The God of self.

After this movie I couldn’t help but hold my son close. Disgusted and ashamed of the ways we inadvertently support PP and it’s views in our society.

From the food we eat, clothes we wear, music and media we listen to, words we speak, makeup we plaster our faces with, and healthcare we empty our pockets to…

Vaccines, food preservatives, taxes…we’re the biggest supporters of the thing we hate. We keep these places in business and we propagate the need behind them.

Today, I researched ways in which I could fight against the grain of injustice. I discovered which major food/beverage companies support PP and even utilize fetal cells in the creation of its products. The list was insane! The abomination is so interconnected and hidden that even Gerber got away with it!

If you’re interested in this list here is the link:

This list I’m sure is not all-inclusive. But a good start—fortunately, the less processed foods and drinks you use the less likely it is affiliated. I try and stick with store brand and unprocessed items myself.

As for vaccines, I know almost all of us had many that were on the list. Both in childhood and given to our own children. The most recent of which, the COVID vaccines are no better (Project Veritas uncovered the truth behind their usage of fetal cells). Unfortunately, this knowledge isn’t exactly power over the vaccine mandates because in order to justify not complying over religious reasons—you would have to hold this stance with everything else.

In other words, I’ve seen healthcare workers file religious exemptions over this and still lose their jobs because they had either had other vaccines with fetal cells in them or had/have products in their homes that use fetal cells. You could claim ignorance if it were true, but because of the worldwide web—we have access to these facts one way or another and have to live with what we know.

I’ve recently made the decisions for my son to have his normal vaccines, I hold a stance against the COVID vaccine on accounts of it being dangerous/experimental and unnecessary. I also stand firm against it because of the political agenda behind it. But above all else I should stand against it for the fetal cells, the genocide of innocent children that was used to create it.

Should I also avoid all other vaccines that are affiliated? Polio…mumps…measles etc? It is a messy situation we find ourselves. In which we too have been brainwashed and have grown numb to the grey of this world. The line is blurry between good and evil at times…this should not be.

Lastly, I look into ways I could be a pro-life activist and saw that the options were rather limited. Not so in a spiritual sense but in a “what can I do with my own two hands” sense.

The only option was to volunteer at a pro-life pregnancy center near me. In our hometown this is called, “Voice of Hope.”

I had gone through the programs myself when I was pregnant since we are a single income family and they had such a surplus or resources like toys, diapers, wipes, clothes, and even free ultrasounds for women who can’t afford it.

Despite this, there is little else that these centers offer. At least that is the voice of many secular women looking for emotional support and financial help.

Women complain of the religious components of these programs, having to take lengthy courses in order to receive free clothing and such, and feeling misunderstood when it comes to their needs and wants. Most of the women who go to these centers are already planning on keeping their babies so it isn’t exactly reaching those who are on the fence or who are wanting abortions.

There is, I believe an answer for every need and it’s unique to each person. That is why I don’t personally discredit the existence of these centers. The truth is, every pregnant woman has multiple resources and paths to take—-not all of them are easy, but society still favors the women and her success.

Churches should be the ones to come alongside hurting mothers. Families, parents, grandparents, husbands….they all play a vital role in child-rearing! This “feminist” culture is destroying the family and in destroying the family they are destroying women and their function to create life and nurture it. Instead we are told to work, pursue our own dreams and careers and abstain from anything that would hinder that. Much like what Abby discovered at PP when she wanted to start her family.

It’s time we start redefining as a nation what we stand for and what really matters. If we really wanted abortion, suicide, domestic violence, divorce, drug abuse, neglect and child abuse, alcoholism, and poverty to drop we wouldn’t shrink back as a church but press all the more forward.

We know that you cannot stop evil by committing more evil. (Like fighting fire with fire),

We know what these people are needing in to their lives! What they are missing and trying to fill with meaningless short-term happiness/gratifications!


And it’s time the church learns what it means to love like Christ again.

Love is the only thing that will talk a person off of a cliff edge. It is the only thing that will reach them.

And so I ask what will you do to fight injustice? In what ways will you love and support your hurting women and families in your life or in your town?

Dead Things Don’t Grow


“We used to sacrifice ourselves for our children; now we sacrifice our children for ourselves.”

-Author/Speaker: Frank Turek

It was a day of mourning in New York City on Jan. 22 when a law passed to allow abortions up to the time of birth. In this once great city, you can now freely get an abortion at any point in your pregnancy and it can be done by “anyone”, as the law says that abortions don’t have to be carried out by a doctor. This will only feed the business, or monster per se. And what can be done? What can we do to protect the unborn when more and more laws are being enacted to allow such heinous murder to continue?

I was listening to American Family Radio the other day, an organization that is listed as a “hate group” because of its firm root in basic morality, when I heard the quote above. I know for a fact that sacrificial parents still exist, however, as our culture changes, the biological impulse to protect our children is being erased and warped. People are actually believing that we are “protecting” these babies from a life of pain and rejection by killing them. They point their fingers at the conservative Christians saying that we are the ones who don’t value life, as if it is our fault that so many children reside in foster care and orphanages.

A woman’s choice. I am getting sick of the phrase, “it’s her choice, her right as a woman to have an abortion.” If a man were to stab his newborn baby everyone would scream. MURDERER!” And yet if a woman asks someone to kill her child for her she is praised and lifted up as the pinnacle of modern feminism. “But it’s just a cluster of cells, not a baby.” Where is the logic behind this statement? As the title of this blog so says, “dead things don’t grow.” Growth and maturity are in the very definition of Life as described in the Webster Dictionary:

“Life is the condition that distinguishes animals and plants from inorganic matter, including the capacity for growth, reproduction, functional activity, and continual change preceding death.”

Another argument squashed in an instant. And what else do they claim? That it goes against women’s rights. Hello, female babies are being aborted every day, what about their rights? And equality can’t be claimed here because giving a woman the right to murder is placing her above the law and moral boundaries that should confine every person whether man or woman. It isn’t enough to be equal, women long to become gods. Just observe the modern day feminist movement and you will see a sickening shift toward domination and sexism. They want to get rid of the natural man and replace him with their own version. Anyone who stands in their way is labeled a sexist in turn accept to those who oppose, the media makes sure the title sticks.

I truly believe that the media is the feminist movement’s greatest weapon. If you can sway the media to promote your vision or ideals, then you will have America eating out of the palm of your hands. We are all wrapped up in the belief that the news channel always tells the truth, that they couldn’t possibly be altering the way they film specific events. To those watching, the images don’t lie, and yet you can find a great many ways in which camera angles alone can get you picking sides.


Here’s a link for more examples: Media Photos

Lastly, let’s talk about the reasons behind abortions. Many who are pro-choice would use the “rape” scenario to stop arguments in their tracks. So what about women who became pregnant due to rape? or women who endanger their own lives by going through with a pregnancy? These are very specific and quite honestly, rare situations that only make up about 1.5% of the population (Focus on the Family). The majority of abortions truly are “convenience” based, so anyone using such rare scenarios to justify the remaining murder of 60,069,971 babies since Roe vs. Wade (1973) is completely off point.

Oddly enough, those who promote abortions and feminism also openly say that they stand for minorities. However, the minority abortion statistics are rather unsettling. Here are the statistics from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (2015):

“Black non-Hispanic women have the highest abortion ratio. Black women’s abortion ratio has reached 444 abortions per 1,000 live births, while non-Hispanic white women’s abortion ratio is 124 abortions per 1,000 live births.”

Minorities fall victim to those who promote abortion as a viable option. In other words, organizations like Planned Parenthood, feed off of the poor and struggling minorities who face real worries about how they will be able to support/care for their children. No one explains the emotional damage abortion brings, the physical damage (there’s nothing natural at all about having your unborn child ripped from you), the overall cultural damage, you will remain a minority if you do not reproduce and bare children who could potentially rise above the societal hurdles and pave a way for a better future.

That is what we are doing, creating generational gaps, keeping God’s children from their purposes here on earth. What if we have aborted the very child who would’ve discovered a cure for cancer? When we kill a baby we don’t just kill them but who they would’ve become and the children and children’s children they would’ve borne after them. At their last dying breath, future millions fade into oblivion.

The most oppressed people today aren’t the minorities, aren’t women, aren’t even Christians or Jews….the most oppressed people are children. They are the voiceless, the ones who are killed for the sake of convenience, treated as less than human, protected less than animals, and discarded like trash in the street. Abortion solves nothing, it is the equivalent of fighting fire with an even bigger fire. The sin of sex outside of marriage (most women who abort are unmarried and young), the devaluing of family and sex, the selfish push for individuality over Godly submission has led to the cheapening of life as a whole. A child is a blessing from God, not a curse or a burden holding you back.

Mother Teresa said it best when she refuted peoples claims that there are too many children in the world. She worked in the poorest and darkest places, and yet she never lost sight of the value of a child, no matter how full the orphanages were, no matter what condition the children she cared for were in, a child was a gift and would remain so.

“Saying there are too many children is like saying there are too many flowers.”

Caucasian girl picking flowers in field




Who has the right to decide someone’s value?

I believe the answer to that question is their “creator” or “maker.”

This very thought got me thinking about the problems in our society today. Do you know that right now the number of abortions this year is well over 22,000,000 and climbing every minute?

At the same time an unborn infant screams, there are birthday celebrations and baby showers with parents beaming with pride and love. How can both exist in one world? In one country? What is the true value of a child?

No one really knows. But we do know that they are worth more than we can imagine, that we are worth so much that God would send His Son to die for us. That Jesus would storm the gates of Hell for us, that the Holy Spirit would be with us always, remaining our companion even when we grieve Him.

God made us all by hand, each one of us is a masterpiece reflecting His heart. And yet, we destroy so many of His works of art. We can block it out, cover our ears and close our eyes. God cannot. He hears and sees everything we do under the sun, and He hears each cry, each plea for life. And yet He still loves us.

The problem is that our society is trying to erase God, and become “gods” themselves. If you’re a god, you can then be considered the “creator” of the life that is growing in your womb. And if you are the creator then it is your right to destroy your creation. It’s yours, after all, you decide the value of what you create.

The truth would be harder to swallow. That when we take a life it isn’t our right to take it. That the baby growing inside you isn’t being crafted by your hands but by the hands of Almighty God. Just because I am a woman and can be used as God’s vessel to bring life into the world, doesn’t mean that I can choose to end that life. We surrender to God’s will, not He to ours. I hold no power apart from Him, He created me with the ability to bear children, therefore He created in essence, the very idea of children.

And so the world values what it wishes, discards what it wishes, blind by its inability to understand that nothing is original to us. Everything we have “made” was first perceived by God, and would not be possible for us if it wasn’t for what God has already created, such as our hands, our eyes, and our minds.

The importance of value is that it is important. God may not have told us the exact value of a rose or a sparrow, but He has made it very clear that we are valued above all these. That we are the center of His heart, and that everything else He created for us. That we might reign with Him, as His sons and daughters.

Abortion isn’t the only way we devalue life. We do this through race, religion, wealth, beauty, gender, talent, and sexuality. It isn’t a new thing to look down upon a person, in fact, it is birthed from selfish pride. A sin that everyone has faced, even if they didn’t let it reside in their hearts so deeply.

That is why the idea of “surrender” seems distasteful. And yet in Christianity, surrender takes on a different meaning than what society has defined it as. To society, surrender means to give up, to wave a white flag and be captured unwillingly by a stronger enemy. It is seen as a sign of weakness, in war movies, the main character would rather die fighting than ever surrender. In Christianity, it is a sign of trust, love, reverence, and worship. It is likened to what Jesus did when he became a servant, kneeling at the feet of his disciples and washing them. It was a display of honor.

I’m not trying to shame those who have sinned, but in order for true repentance to take place, sin must first be recognized. A conviction of the heart must take place. Jesus died for every sin, no matter how awful the sin may be. There is grace, forgiveness, and love. No one is immune to sin, and the agenda of this world is to influence good hearts, to deceive blameless minds into doing the unthinkable.

I am merely pained, as I type this. I find myself just as guilty at turning away from the souls crying out for a savior. How can I laugh, watch TV, go about my day-to-day in a country that is murdering millions of innocent babies? We watch documentaries about the Holocaust and are sickened by what we see. We ask, how could the Germans let this happen in their own backyards? And look at us! We let the destruction of entire generations happen. I’m tired of only hearing, “all lives matter,” without the explanation of why. It’s sad but it’s true that people need to be reminded of why.

If God mattered to us then automatically all lives would matter to us. God transforms hearts and minds to reflect His. We can’t look in a mirror and expect to change, we have always needed to look to God. The truth is people were made to worship, and if we don’t worship God we will worship something else, in this case, ourselves. People uphold humanity as if it is a growing, changing thing. Like we can outgrow our need for a God or morality. When the reality is that, although we may develop in some ways, we still remain humans, fallible, imperfect, and bound to make the same mistakes we have made countless times before.

And so, when you go back out into the world remember this. The boss that may have ticked you off, the lady who pulled out in front of you at an intersection, the kid throwing a tantrum in the grocery store, the baby with a dirty diaper….are all priceless. Their value is set, by God Himself. Your value is set, no one can take away your value, your worth. You were paid for in full by Jesus Christ.

All lives matter, all lives are valuable, all lives were created by God.