It’s a boy! 💙

Benjamin Edward Slob

Last week we finally had our anatomy ultrasound for our second child to determine the gender.

I knew in my heart that it was another boy. With my first, I felt so strongly that it was a girl that I blinked in shock at the screen.

Now James has a brother…and I’m no novice, but a level 2 boy mom 😅, it’s fitting though! As a preschool teacher at my church and having worked at a daycare previously, boys are less drama.

Oh still a handful! But I’ve always known how to handle them and have loved what they love…dinosaurs, digging in the dirt, adventures, bugs…it’s all up my alley.

This pregnancy has been both easier and harder. I can’t just spoil myself and lay around bonding with this new kicking child in my stomach. Now I have a 2 1/2 year old to contend with.

But the excitement is multiplied for sure! Covid is over (as far as I’m concerned) and so are it’s penitentiary-like regulations which made it impossible to “enjoy” my first birth experience.

Now I can truly celebrate! And to make things even more special…James gets to meet his brother.

Will he be excited? Upset? Confused?

I’ve tried very hard to explain it to him in a way he can grasp. He knows there’s a baby in my tummy, but does he know what that means for him?

James has been tied around my finger since birth. And potty training hasn’t gone great. He still wakes up once or twice a night for a drink. At nap, he still prefers the nook of my arm.

Will he adapt to sharing mommy? Will Aaron and I adapt to two kids? Will I?

It’s been harder to grasp the reality this time. This baby was a surprise, and having James to care for has made it hard to really think much about the other child within me. But boy those kicks are increasing and with it—I can’t ignore the coming day any longer!

My eyes were glued to every movement on that ultrasound. The way he held his head in his little hands and sucked his thumb. Twisting and rolling to find a more comfortable position in the cramped space.

I’m 20 weeks tomorrow and already hunting for all the items I need. Car seats, bassinets, diaper bag…everything I had borrowed the first time or had sold/threw away I now need again asap!

It’s exciting and scary. I haven’t forgotten my last birth experience. The epidural and actual birth was the most pleasant part of the whole process. The only time I could truly escape into numbness from the pain and trauma.

When I held James it didn’t feel real. I was so much in shock that it took me awhile to feel. But my body did seem to know what to do…it knew how to hold my son, how to feed him, and I couldn’t help but pull his little rolling crib beside my bed the first night at the hospital.

This time, I have to consider visitors, being able to pass my son over to my family for a well earned nap or shower. I’ll be allowed to watch his first bath! Just another moment I was denied before.

My due date is June 8th. My first son was due the 7th (born May 30th). And my birthday is May 29. 😅 One of us may lose a birthday.

I really could use some prayer as I continue to navigate pregnancy and as I welcome this new baby into the world and into our home. You all have been a positive blessing to me, and I appreciate all your kind words and prayers throughout the years.

Thank you! God bless ❤️

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